Tall Men (7/10)

mv5by2nhmmmzy2etyja4yy00mgq2lthlndqtzjriodk3nzfiyza4l2ltywdlxkeyxkfqcgdeqxvymzuzmzyxnti-_v1_sy1000_cr007261000_al_

Terrence Mackleby is an earnest but not-so-bright man who may have killed his girlfriend when he was a boy. He is now a grown-up who works at a warehouse with Lucy the wallflower, Edith the conspiracy theorist, and Lee, who plays cribbage and is creeped out by the conspiracy theorist after making the mistake of sleeping with her. Terrence has just declared bankruptcy due to his overwhelming credit card debt. After going on a date with Lucy the wallflower, he receives an offer for a special credit card with a 4% interest rate, which he gets and uses to buy a new car. Soon after, he starts seeing shadowy tall men following him, and he is fired from his job by his boss, who is sporting some new bruises on his face. To add to his desperate situation, he learns that the terms of his new credit card are not what they seem, and he starts to see and hear some really strange things.

While this is a little slow, and certainly over-long at 2 hours and 13 minutes, it’s still an entertaining slice of whimsical dark humor. The atmosphere is stylish, the acting is good, and the concept is original. Worth a watch for those that enjoy a more cerebral, psychological horror film.

Advertisements

Infernal (7/10)

mv5bmtkxotayndy2n15bml5banbnxkftztgwmdixmdawnte-_v1_sy1000_cr007071000_al_

A couple have a kid who is weird and can’t stop brushing her hair. Is she autistic, or the devil? Spoiler alert: It’s that second thing.

So this is basically a found-footage hipster version of The Omen. While not the most original idea, or even slightly original, it does a pretty good job of being creepy and actually works, for the most part. They really needed to cut back on the cricket sounds in the background though, really freakin’ annoying. No boobs but still worth a look.

Free Fall (6/10)

mv5bmji0mjq1mdmxnv5bml5banbnxkftztgwnjawntk0mje-_v1_sy1000_cr007091000_al_

So this chick who likes to kickbox works for Malcolm McDowell’s financial company and finds that he’s involved in embezzling from pension funds. Old Malc sends in a hired killer to take her out. She gets stuck in an elevator while escaping. No way for her to get out, no way for him to get in. And so forth.

Decent little thriller. Nothing super-special, but some of the elevator shenanigans were fairly original. Sarah Butler, playing the kickboxing chick, has some great moves in a short skirt, but keeps the boobs holstered.

Dreamland (5/10)

mv5bmtg5mji5mtyzm15bml5banbnxkftztcwmtqzmjgymq-_v1_

A trashy white couple are driving through Nevada when they encounter UFO nuts, timewarps, a holographic WW2 soldier, a creepy ghost girl, and Alien Hitler. Weirdo super-low-budget sci-fi weirdness. Best line: “Elvis, isn’t he dead?”

So, I really have no idea what happened in this movie. Well, I have some idea, but it still doesn’t really make any sense. In any case, it was goofy enough to be sort of entertaining. Worth a watch I guess, but I watched it, so you probably don’t need to. And yet again, no boobs. What’s wrong with filmmakers these days?

Trucks (4/10)

mv5bmtixmtgznjk4nv5bml5banbnxkftztcwnjgymdyxmq-_v1_

1997 TV movie adaptation of the same Stephen King short story that Maximum Overdrive was based on. Not nearly as horrifically and hilariously bad as MO, but still a goofy idea. Timothy Busfield is in this for some reason. Worth a watch for historical purposes if you have nothing better to do.